I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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