it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
