this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Randomize
