i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
