God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
