So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
