chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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