just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
