i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
