she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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