Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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