meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
smell my finger.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
