bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Why did my mother make you get naked?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
