Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
