your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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