well most of my day revolves around power hour
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
