I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize