winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
