I hope mine doesn't look like that
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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