so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
The Olympian is in my bed
Randomize
