go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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