all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Let the clothes fall where they may.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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