how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
