when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
