so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize
