He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Found the puke drawer
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
