The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
