is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
