the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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