Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize
