this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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