Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
