we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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