Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
