where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
