I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
