Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Randomize
