he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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