so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize