I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize
