return my video game
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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