im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
