I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
