i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize
