No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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