Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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