Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
as a side note pls kill me
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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