found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
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