he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
