I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
