wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
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